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Why Blame Doesn't Belong in Your Divorce Strategy

  • Writer: Jay Ingrum
    Jay Ingrum
  • Apr 4
  • 2 min read

Legal Lens: Viewing Laws Through Ingrum Expertise





When emotions are high and your marriage is ending, it’s natural to want to assign blame—or even take it on yourself. At Ingrum Law, we understand that many clients walk through the door feeling guilt, anger, or frustration. But here’s the truth: in most divorce cases, there’s plenty of fault to go around.


One of the first things people want to do is explain what went wrong. But focusing on blame usually isn’t helpful—especially in the courtroom.


What Judges Actually Care About


In Tennessee, judges are less concerned with who did what and more focused on dividing assets and establishing custody in a way that’s fair and in the best interest of the children. Unless the case involves habitual drug use, spousal or child abuse, or criminal activity, "fault" plays a very minor role in decisions like:

  • Division of assets and debts

  • Custody and visitation arrangements

  • Property distribution


Where fault can have some influence is in awarding attorney’s fees or determining alimony, but even then, it's just one factor of many.


A Calmer Path Forward


At Ingrum Law, our approach is to de-escalate the conflict. We don’t engage in legal warfare just for the sake of a fight. When the opposing counsel takes a more aggressive, drama-fueled path, we choose facts over fire. By taking the high road, we not only protect your interests—we often reduce the emotional and financial toll that prolonged litigation can bring.


If you’re navigating a divorce in Tennessee, let us help you keep things focused, fair, and future-oriented. Especially if children are involved, a peaceful resolution saves more than money—it protects their emotional well-being.


Schedule a Consultation


Ready to take a calm, confident step toward a better future? Contact Ingrum Law today for a consultation. We’ll listen, guide you through your options, and work to secure the best possible outcome for your family.

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